Disclaimer: Willow and Angel and the rest to the BtVs gang
belong to joss, The Wb and Mutant enemy, not me. The Song Lonely too long,
belongs to patty loveless we think...
Lonely Too Long
She sat uneasily at her kitchen table, and for the first time
in nearly five years, she felt uncertain of herself in her own home. She
moved about making a breakfast she wouldn't eat and trying to fathom what
had happened last night. It started out like any other evening. She'd gone
to the Bronze, as Xander had insisted, saying that they had to go for old
time's sake. She'd given in, wanting for a moment to relive a night from
their shared past. The only thing missing had been Buffy.
Buffy had been gone for five years. Long deadly years that
had taken their toll on Sunnydale. People at least had become smart enough
to leave, or perhaps new ones merely quit coming; Willow was never sure.
Buffy had left senior year after the return of Angel and their bittersweet
Willow had always remembered Angel with fondness. He'd always
been there, watching from the shadows protecting them. She hadn't seen Angel
since he'd left for L.A. back in September of her first year at college
eight years ago. She had graduated with honors, found her work allowed her
to stay at home, and bought a home to stay in.
Xander always said the house was too big for just her. He
had been right and this morning it seemed even larger. The young woman picked
up the clothes that lay where they fell last night intending to wash and
dry them. She was still antsy, and she couldn't help it. Last night had
been, well, something she had never dreamed of, and she still trembled with
the memory...her body awash with remembered sensations. She hadn't known
she could feel that way.
She moved to the coffeepot, poured herself a cup and absently
turned on the radio. She smiled as soft strains of music filled the kitchen.
Something sad and smoky for the moment. She didn't regret last night and
wouldn't trade a second of it, but where did it leave them.
They had met at the Bronze after the gang left, had sat talking
until the club had closed, finally coming to her house, where they had talked
more over late night coffee. With not even alcohol to blame, she couldn't
contribute her actions on lowered inhibitions - not that it would have happened
had she been drinking. She knew him well enough to know that he would have
stopped had he thought she wasn't with him one hundred percent. She had
been and no fault could be found with him. She looked up and smiled softly.
He was standing there in the bedroom doorway, looking far too sexy, sleep
tousled and warm. His dark hair was all in disarray as though she had only
lately run her fingers through it in a fit of passion.
He was watching her, and she realized with some relief that
he was as uncertain in the morning light as she was. She could hear the
song that had begun to play and somewhere in her mind she realized the irony.
It was as though the whole world knew what happened last night, and they
were giving them the okay.
Well Good Mornin'
Tell me how'd you sleep last night
You're still smiling
So we must've done something right
Don't feel guilty
Because you turned to me last night.
He walked over to her in the kitchen, and his eyes locked
with hers. They seemed to ask permission before he leaned down to claim
her lips in a tender good morning kiss. She liked it, could get used to
it, and she wondered if he was feeling the same things. How long had it
been for him? How many women were there in his long line of lovers? Were
there many mornings like this for him? Did he know them as he knew her?
We ain't done nothin' wrong
We've just been lonely too long
No we ain't done nothing wrong
We've just been lonely too long
He drew her into his arms, and she sensed his need to hold
her. Was he afraid that she would disappear in the suns early morning light?
She had half feared that last night had merely been another dream starring
a familiar face. That the loneliness had become too much and she had in
her mind turned to the comfort she had always found in his warm brown gaze.
She remembered every moment they had spent last night...his first tentative
kiss...the shocked hunger that had erupted between them. They had sought
something and found it in each other. She rested her head against his chest
and listened to the sounds of silence. She clung to him, to the memory of
his flesh beneath her fingertips, as he'd brought every hungry, lonely fantasy
she had to life with stunning intensity.
It's only natural
When you've been too long in the dark
To Look for comfort
And to warm yourself by the fire
We're just afraid
That we might get our fingers burned
He stared down at her. He wanted to speak, and she could see
it in his eyes. She understood. Like her, he feared breaking whatever spell
had woven itself around them in the hours of the night. She smiled, tenderness
engulfing her and feelings that had always been there came to the surface
as feelings sometimes do. It wasn't wrong anymore. Once to love him would
have been betrayal of the worst kind, but Buffy threw away his love. He
was fair game assuming that he wanted her. She stared into his eyes once
more unsure. Had she read more into this? Was last night just a casual one-night
stand with an old friend? Somehow she doubted that he found anything that
they had shared casual, but she wanted to be sure. All she had to do was
find the courage to ask. Taking a man to bed was easy; facing him in the
morning was hard. Really hard when he looked at you with the same uncertain
eyes you looked at him with.
Nothing's wrong that can't be cured with a new love
All you need is someone like me to be sure of to be your
She clung to him and her arms held him close, and he was certain
he'd been right. He hadn't believed there was anything casual about the
night before, but he hadn't wanted to say aloud the myriad of emotions eating
at him from within. She was his savior, his anchor, and his angel. She opened
herself to him heart, mind, body, and soul. She had asked for nothing last
night...no promises or commitment...and he feared he misinterpreted her
actions. Maybe she had expected to wake up alone, but he couldn't do that.
She wasn't some nameless woman he used to ease needs too long denied. She
was his friend, maybe his best friend, maybe his love.
I'll be waiting
I'll be waiting right outside your heart
And I'll be watching
For the slightest sign of a spark
And I'll be here
If you should want to turn to me
"Willow?" he whispered, fear making his voice light. She smiled
knowing he was scared. So was she. A relationship wasn't usually started
on a night of passion like the one they had shared. Of course it wasn't
like they were strangers who had never met; they knew each other. True,
time had separated them and guilt had kept them from seeing what might have
been when the fires first stirred, but there was nothing stopping them now.
No one would be hurt by them stealing a little piece of their own heaven.
She smiled warmly at him.
"Stay," she whispered against his skin. "Don't leave me again.
I have missed you so much," she continued, taking the plunge off the edge
- might as well be open about it. She had felt this a long time ago, and
she saw the shock in his eyes...the surprise.
"I never knew," he whispered, shocked.
"Neither did I, at least not until this moment. I think I've
been waiting for you forever." She smiled softly as his mouth touched hers.
We ain't done nothin' wrong
we've just been lonely too long
Oh we ain't done nothin' wrong
both been lonely too long
Just been lonely too long